The Copywriting S.A.U.C.E - #2
Why you should stop talking about yourself, 1940s Nestle, interesting questions and more.
Welcome to the Issue #2 of The Copywriting Sauce!
A newsletter for anyone who wants to learn how to start writing killer sales copy.
Every issue will consist of 5 segments presented in this format S.A.U.C.E :
Saying - A saying or quote
Aged - An old ad
Useful - A useful piece of content or advice
Copy - Review a piece of copy that I found recently
Edit - Edit the copy above into a higher-performing piece.
(Saying, Aged, Useful, Copy, Edit)
You’re guaranteed to learn tons about copywriting and marketing in this short and fun email.
Let’s begin.
Saying
“Your customer should be the hero of your story, not your brand – this is the secret every phenomenally successful business understands.”
Recently, I’ve been trying to find the biggest difference between companies that are doing well in marketing and the ones who aren’t doing so well.
After doing some research and the help of the above, I found the answer.
Those who don’t do too well always talk about themselves (the company and product).
Here are some examples.
"For the past 20 years, our company has been the industry leader.”
“We have the best service in town”
“We’ve won many awards!"
On the other hand, the TOP companies in the world never talk about themselves, but only about their consumers.
Think about Nike. Their “Just Do It” campaign focuses on encouraging individuals to overcome their obstacles and just take action. No time for excuses, take action and to reach their maximum potential.
The consumers just need to DO IT.
Remember that Nike are selling a commodity - shoes, not life coaching programs.
Why does this work for them?
Simply because Nike is making their customers into the hero of the brand’s story.
And at the same time, their customers can be heroes of their own life story as well.
So if you want customers to buy from you, you got to keep talking about your customers — not you.
Aged
Nestle’s Sweet Milk Cocoa Ad (1940s)
Let’s review this ad and see why it worked wonders for Nestle 70 years ago.
10 seconds to make Delicious Hot Nestles - Ease of use and immediate pleasure
A headline like this will always work because we all love things that are FAST and EASY.
Here, it takes only 10 seconds to prepare a delicious breakfast.
It gets even better in the line below. In this same 10 seconds, you get to give your CHILD the “RIGHT START”.
There are so many benefits in there, it’s honestly irresistible.Start the day the happy way
Everyone wants to be happy. This line is a great way of telling the reader that if you drink a nestle product in the morning, it’s starting the day happily.
Whoever that wants a quick cheer up can look towards an instant cup of Nestle’s Sweet Milk Cocoa.
Similar to taking a break while having a KitKat, and Coca Cola’s Opening Happiness.
3. Try it free!
In addition to all the good things of this instant cocoa milk, you get to try it for free? Sign me up immediately, Nestle!
Useful
Here are four useful questions I ask myself once I’m done writing a piece of copy.
This has always helped me push my writing from GOOD to GREAT. And like what Muhammad Ali said.
I don't count my sit ups. I only start counting once it starts hurting.
I strongly believe that every time I ask myself these questions, I get a little better at honing my writing skills.
I’m sure it’ll help you do that too.
Is the copy interesting?
If the reader is yawning while reading your content, chances are is that they will never be able to act the way you want them to.
Add stories. Add emotions. Do whatever it takes to make it interesting.Is it easy to read?
Remember : it’s not the reader’s job to figure out what you mean.
Do not cause confusion because the moment they’re confused, the next thing they’re going to do is to leave.Is it believable?
If what you’re saying is not believable, they’ll know it immediately.“If this company can lie while writing, I’m sure he’s lying about his product.”
The best way to get people to believe you is to tell the truth.
Talk about the good points, but also include why it’s bad.
Honesty is honestly the best policy.Did it fulfil the promise of the headline?
The headline is always the promise to the reader.And if you didn’t fulfil that promise, it means that you’re cheating them!
Be a man of your word (headline). 😝
Copy
In this section, I pick a website/ad and point out the good points and how the copy can be further improved.
Huge thanks to Oliver for giving me a chance to rewrite his site!
For context, this is a store in NYC that sells gifts that are fun and playful. The overall vibe is based on the idea of having FUN.
What’s Good 😁👍 :
Design is eye-catching
An adorable photo of a dog - dog owners and lovers will be interested in reading further
There’s a CTA for them to start shopping
How It Can Be Improved 🤔✍️ :
To include benefits if the customers choose to shop with them - this can be free shipping promotion for example
Possibly include two banners as this banner will chase people away who aren’t dog owners
Introduce the idea the store is selling FUN, instead of gifts. There are probably hundreds of stores that sell gifts in New York. But only a few are able to sell the joy of having FUN.
What’s Good 😁👍 :
A great pop-up to get leads from people who don’t want to purchase yet. Awesome job, Oliver!
“How much will you save? Let’s find out!” - This is a really great strategy as the reader needs to put in their email to find out if they got 10% or 15% or even more!
Furthermore it’s free!
How It Can Be Improved 🤔✍️ :
Remove the bad scenarios on the wheel like “so close”, “I’m sorry” and “try again”
- This is because we don’t want the reader to focus on the negative outcomes.
- Instead, replace them with “FREE SHIPPING for 3 consecutive orders” or something similar.
- If you make it seem like they always win in all situations of the spin wheel, they’ll definitely enter their emailImprove the CTA and Headline.
Edit
Time to edit and sauce up some copy! 👨🍳
If you’ve made it here, I would like to thank you for taking the time out to read the Issue #2 of The Copywriting Sauce.
Let me know if there is anything you liked.
Let me know if there is anything you disliked.
Whatever it is, I want your feedback.
Why? So that I’ll be able to make better content for you in the next issue of The Copywriting Sauce.
Let me know your thoughts by replying to this tweet below :
Thank you very much and I’ll see you guys in the next one.
Ezekiel ✍️
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